World's ugliest kitchen implement Yes it's an Egg Separator... mmmmm...

Childhood beliefs
This is an excellent website about the weird things people told you, and you believed, when you were a child.

Food
"If you don't eat Potato Croquettes in under 1 minute they explode."
"You get poisoned if you eat ice cream from an ice cream van with "dirty" (i.e. black) wheels."
"I used to believe that the Mr Whippy van played the Greensleeves music when he had sold out of all the icecream! My father was such a cheap bast*rd."

Geography
"A friend told me (and I didn't totally disbelieve him either) that when you go in an aeroplane on holiday, the plane just flies around and around in the sky, while the people on the ground change the scenery and the temperature. The more complicated the change, the longer you stayed in the sky (which is why places like Japan take so long to get to). Then, when the people on the ground were finished, you would land back at the same place, but never know the difference!"

Toilets, fear of
"I used to have to get back to my bedroom before the toilet finished flushing"

Religion
"At sunday school we were shown an illustrated children's book about "the Prodigal son". He was wearing a "dress" so for a while I thought that "prodigal" meant transvestite and that was why he had to leave his family, but in the end they decided to accept him..."

Geek dies after playing computer games for 86 hours non stop One less to not bother with showering, but does he have another two lives left?

Random (untested) very funny thing of the day needs sound, unless you lipread.

Bart Simpson's Blackbroad Wisdom from all the episodes in one handy website for you to read.
[Credit due to http://EndsoftheEarth.blogspot.com]

A Paper Aeroplane Simulator.... handy
Try it, go on, you know you want to...
[ I managed 78ft after a couple of goes. Use the 'Rate_it' thingy under this post to record you best distance]

Geek joke of the day:

There are 10 kinds of people in the world:
Those that understand binary,
and those that don’t.

OK this week's LATERAL CONCEPT award goes to High Lift Systems who actually have funding from NASA to investigate a Space Elevator. This baby works by having a satellite at the other end of the line orbiting the earth (in a geostationary orbit, ohh err) acting as a massive counterweight, whilst vehicles shimmy up and down a huge carbon ribbon powered light panels energised by a huge (fricking) "laser" beam shot from earth. And you thought the escalator at Angel Tube was long....

56 Questions Ask Jeeves Can't Answer

01 How fast am I going?
02 What's the point?
03 Is there a God?
04 Where does the time go?
05 Are you Jeeves?
06 Could you lay out my morning suit and tell my aunts Betty and Jemimah that I will join them in the drawing room?
07 Why can't I stop crying?
08 Which witch is which?
09 Are you going out dressed like that?
10 Is there something you want to tell me?
11 Who'd have thought it?
12 Know what I mean?
13 What number am I thinking of?
14 Are we there yet?
15 Who's your daddy?
16 Why has my nan got hairy cheeks?
17 Where did I leave my car keys?
18 Isn't she lovely?
19 Where's our next round of funding going to come from?
some more questions the old boy has trouble with:
21 Does my bum look big in this?
22 Is that it?
23 What did I miss?
24 What the f*ck?
25 What is the melting point of people?
26 You wana piece of me?
27 Can you tell what it is yet?
28 Wazzzzzzzzzzzzuppppppppppppppppppppp?
29 What the hell am I doing here?
30 Can you hear me?
31 Why do birds...suddenly appear...everytime... you are near?
32 You startin?
33 How long is a piece of string?
34 How soon is now?
35 How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
even more queries the duffer chokes on:
36 Are we alone?
37 Whatever happened to white dog turds?
38 I'm in the bath - can you get the door for me?
39 How do you like it, big boy?
40 Are we there yet?
41 Is there someone else?
42 Why didn't you call?
43 What are you like?
44 Who gives the Queen a birthday card on her 100th birthday?
45 Who ate all the pies?
46 Is there something in my teeth?
yet more poser the antiquated home help fails to respond to:
47 Come here often?
48 What is the best site on the Internet?
49 Who made heaven a place on Earth?
50 How can you sleep at night?
51 Whatchoo talkin bout Jeeves?
52 If the same dog goes down to the same beach and collects the same amount of golf balls, how many ships does it see?
53 Is there chicken in chickpeas?
54 Why is Kentish town so-called when it's in north London, not Kent?
55 You wouldn't would you?
56 Is it me or is it hot in here?

Romanian sick of democracy applies for asylum in Iraq

A Romanian man who lived most of his life under Nicolae Ceaucescu says he hates living in a democracy and has asked for asylum in Iraq.

Constantin Simion, 52, from Campineanca, told the National newspaper that he's applied for asylum in Iraq because he is "sick of the injustice of democracy".

He says the Communist controlled factory where he had worked for 17 years had been closed under democracy and since then everything had gone "downhill".

He has already contacted the Iraqi embassy in Bucharest about an asylum application, he said.

"I cannot wait to become one of Saddam's people. I want to leave for Iraq, but if Iraq says no, then I'll try my luck with Libya or Cuba - anything that is a totalitarian regime. I am sick of the injustice of democracy," he said.

Rub my Ducky!!
I found a website that was commenting about this little bath accessory - right up there with the Harry Potter Vibrating Broom Stick

How to disarm a surveillance camera and other handy household tips